Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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