ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
