I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Bring me that man meat
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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