I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
