Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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