Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
there was a trapeze. enough said
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
