Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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