these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
