My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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