so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
