I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
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