party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize