I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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