It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
