At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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