Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.