wakey wakey hands off snakey
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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