fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
please come you make the beer taste better
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
