Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
