I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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