areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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