Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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