Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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