I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
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You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
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well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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