I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
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just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
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he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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