Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
