It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
