just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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