I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Come share oat with me in your robe
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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