I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.