Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
you made out with another girl for some wings
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
