Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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