Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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