They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
