i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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