Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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