I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
