So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
