Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize
