Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
