just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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