Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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