I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize