Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
