Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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