everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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