I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i already hear my dad disowning me
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
