There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
