So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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