Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Still dying that you shit outside
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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