You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
